It first started as a day to day thing. One day I would wake up feeling fine and the next few moments or so my body would start to break down. I would feel the pain shooting up my arm and then gradually start to send pulsating shocks in my fingers.
A few months ago I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I have never even heard of it until I started seeing different doctors for the chronic pain I always seemed to be in. I would get enough sleep and eat better food and still nothing could make the aching pain go away.
Why am I mentioning all of this, you may ask? It is quite simple. I’m a writer. Not only do being in college full time requires lots of writing, but one day I would love to finally finish my novel. I started taking my writing pretty serious in 2013. I started by writing two short stories and I got lucky enough to meet a wonderful writing group on Facebook.
Now, I have to pace myself. As much as I would love to be able to write for hours on end each day, it is simply not possible. My goal for the year was too finish a novella and a novel outside of the two anthologies I am currently a part of. Though I have a wonderful support system, there are many things I feel like maybe I bit off more than I could chew.
Many days it is a struggle to focus and my memory is completely shot. I have to constantly make notes and having my fiancé remind me of things. So you can imagine how hard it is sometimes to focus on writing.
Do I believe that this would stop me from writing completely? No. Sure, it slows me down significantly. I have good days and bad days. Sadly, as of right now there are more bad days. However, as each day passes, I feel myself more able to figure out how to balance my writing time with this chronic pain.
Life is all about playing the cards you were dealt. Right now these are the cards I have in my hand and I can say I think I am doing quite well. As for the fibromyalgia, I have two words for you. Fuck you! (Excuse my language, but it’s true.) I won’t let you stop me from doing what makes me happy and my happiness is writing.