The Vacation Play by Play

A few months ago, I brought you the Webinar Play by Play. If you missed it, and you want a laugh, I recommend clicking the link. It’s probably funnier than this post, but I’d ingested a lot of wine that day. Anyway, I digress…

Today, I bring you the Vacation Play by Play. What’s that, you ask? It’s me, giving you the details of my recent summer vacation, via conversations with various members of my family.

First, let me explain this vacation. For nearly ten years now, for one week each summer, I have joined my youngest brother and his family, my father, and my middle brother and his kids (although he’s hit or miss, so this really only happens when we’re lucky – but that’s a whole other blog post about family dynamics and I do not believe I have enough wine in the house to get into it just yet), and we have spent a week sharing a cottage on a lake, somewhere in the state of Michigan. It is one week each year we all (er, most of us) look forward to with anticipation, for the rest of the year.

Summer Vacay 2015
Our Cottage

Vacationing with extended family can be fun. It can also be stressful. But let’s face it, vacationing with your husband and kids can be stressful, too. I will say, though, we have never left that vacation saying, “I don’t ever want to do this again.” Usually, it’s more along the lines of, “Ready to start planning for next year?”
This year, we travelled north, over the Mackinaw Bridge, and into Michigan’s Upper Peninsula. We stayed in a place called De Tour, which is about the furthest east you can get in the UP, with the glaring exception of Drummond Island. We stayed on a small, shallow lake called Caribou Lake (no, we did not see any Caribou), and we had high hopes that, as it was late July and the lake was shallow, we might actually get in some quality lounging-on-the-beach time (which is how I define a quality summer vacation).

This is what actually transpired:

Day Before First Day of Vacation

Me: “We have to leave by eight o’clock tomorrow morning, if we’re going to be on time to meet everyone at the last real grocery store before the bridge.”

Hubs: “We’ll be fine if we leave by nine.”

Me: “We never leave on time. Let’s plan for eight, then we’ll actually leave by nine.”

Hubs: Gives me The Look.

12 Year Old Son, while reading the description of the cottage we rented: “Wait, there’s no wifi at this place?”

Hubs, not trying very hard to stifle a laugh: “Nope.”

Son: “Why bother going? What’s the point of vacation without wifi?”

Hubs: “Really?”

Me: “You’ll survive.”

10 year old Daughter: “I don’t need wifi. All the games I like to play on my Kindle don’t require internet.”

Son: Walks away grumbling under his breath.


Vacation Day One

Me: “Oh my God, are we really leaving on time for the first time in the history of vacations?”

Hubs: “It’s nine-oh-one. We’re late.”

Son: “How are we going to survive without wifi?”


Vacation Day Two

Son: “There’s no wifi. But Grandpa brought me a bunch of fireworks!”

Me: “Dear God, why were fireworks ever invented?”


Summer Vacay Taqu Falls
It’s hard to take a bad pic of Tahquamenon Falls (although it’s hard as hell to spell it)

Vacation Day Three – A visit to Tahquamenon Falls State Park, followed by dinner at Brown Fisheries Fish House, where you can get arguably some of the best whitefish you’ve ever eaten in your life.

Son: “There are fireworks when we get back to the cottage!”


Vacation Day Four – A visit to Sault Saint Marie, where we take a boat tour through the locks and then wander down the main drag and stop for dinner at a restaurant with a fabulous view of the massive freighters as they enter and leave the locks.

Son: “I want to be a seaman.”

My hubs: “You said seaman.”

Me: “What about the wifi?”

Son: “Who cares?”

My dad, who has lived in the Deep South for the past thirty years: “We aren’t really eating outside, are we? It’s freezing up here in the Great White North. I think I can see my breath.”

Me: “It’s July.”

My dad: “It’s freezing.”

Me: “Table inside, please.”


Summer Vacay 2015 No Wifi
The Family That Vacations Together….

Vacation Day Five – Hoping for summer-like weather, we decide to hang out at the cottage and spend the day on the lake.

My dad: “It’s freezing.”

My sister in law: “It’s freezing.”

My brother: “It’s freezing.”

Me: “It’s freezing.”

My hubs: “It’s perfect.”

Me: “Nobody mention the wifi.”


Vacation Day Six: Drummond Island, Michigan’s Family Playground

My dad: “It’s Michigan’s most famous family playground.”

My son: “I’m bored.”

My hubs: “Hey, there’s—”

Me: “Don’t you dare say it.”


Vacation Day Seven: It’s time to pack up and admit that reality beckons.

Summer Vacay 2015 Mac Bridge
Heading back to the land of the trolls…

My son: “I’m all out of fireworks.”
Me: “You’ll have wifi in about five hours.”

My son: “This was the best vacation ever!”


And that, I think, accurately sums up the week we spent, bonding as a family unit. And I cannot tell a lie: I’m already looking forward to next year.

How about you – any funny stories from your summer vacation?




Tami Lund writes blogs. She writes books, too. Sometimes, they’re even funny. See for yourself HERE.

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